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Poetic Justice
A man who absolutely hated his wife's cat decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park. As he was nearing home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day, he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away and try the same thing. As we was driving back into his driveway, there was the cat! He kept taking the cat farther and farther away, but the darn cat would always beat him home. At last, he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right and so on until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and he left the cat there. Hours later, the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat there?" "Yes," the wife answers. "Why do you ask?" Frustrated, the man answers: "Put that darn cat on the phone. I'm lost and I need directions!"
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The Truth about Cats and Dogs.................
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.
An aquarium is just interactive television for cats.
Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it.
Although cats are rather delicate creatures, and they are subject to a good many ailments, I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia.
Buy a dog a toy and it will play with it forever.
Buy a cat a present and it will play with the wrapper for 10 minutes.
Dogs and cats instinctively know the exact moment their owners will wake up. Then they wake them 10 minutes sooner.
Dog's have owners.
Cat's have staff.
Dogs believe they are human.
Cats believe they are God.
Dogs shed, cats shred.
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult?
If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket then giving Fido only two of them.
No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.
Things that upset a terrier may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great Dane.
Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.
People that hate cats will come back as dogs in their next life.
I hope to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.
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It’s such a Good Day!
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